It’s not a contest

we draw up sides and choose the side that we believe to be superior. Morally, ethically, intellectually, spiritually.

When my kids were growing up, I used to say this to them over and over:

“It’s not a contest”

If they were fighting with each other, if they were upset because some kid at school had something they didn’t have, if they weren’t the most popular or the best at something:

“It’s not a contest”

I said this to them over and over because I didn’t want them to live their lives always comparing themselves to others and hoping to figure out how to feel good in contrast to what others had or were. 

But let’s be honest, it feels impossible to exorcise this particular demon.  

I mean, our very basic evolutionary impulse tells us that it absolutely IS a contest.  There are resources out there and we want to compete to get them.   And even though the resources we compete for today may not be as tangible and survival-necessary as our predecessors, we’re still the same animals and our hard-wiring tells us it’s a contest. 

We have a primal drive to have the most resources.  The most money, the nicest house, the greatest vacations, the coolest car, the most enviable life. 

I want you to want what I have.  I want you to look at my life and think, “I want what she has” 

And when we can’t compete on that level, we might swing to the opposite extreme and work to have the least.  At least we can win at being the most frugal, the most minimalistic, the most simplistic and unattached. 

It IS a contest

We have a primal drive to be the best.  The best employee, the best mother, the best student, the best looking, the strongest, the thinnest, the smartest, the funniest, the healthiest, the most successful. 

And if not the best, then certainly better….. than someone.  So, we draw up sides and choose the side that we believe to be superior.  Morally, ethically, intellectually, spiritually. 

And… this is important … we almost always choose a side on which we think we have a chance of winning the contest. IF we are not that smart, we won’t choose the intellectual side. If we are not athletic, we won’t choose the physical side. If we are not rich and have no way to expect we will ever be so, we won’t choose the money side.

It IS a contest. 

It’s exhausting. 

Try as I might to get the contest demon out of my head.  I just cannot. 

Can you?

To comment, click on the Header “It’s Not a Contest”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

The Anti-Christ Gospel - Your Gift

God will bless you tenfold.

“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you,”… don’t worry about it, especially if they are in the wrong.  They are probably a libtard anyway.  My judgement is on them.   It’s not your problem to solve.  Go ahead and give your tithe.  God will bless you tenfold.  He’s not concerned about your relationship with your fellow man, he’s more concerned about your money and prosperity. 

To comment, click on the title - “The Anti-Christ Gospel - Your Gift”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

We are all soul mates

you are taking in the very incarnation of god

Each and every one of us are soul mates. We are all one body whether we want to acknowledge it or not. We always were. We are all tied to one another as the human organism.

And even more, tied to the entire creation as one body.  Interdependent.  Dependent on each other for our very lives.  Dependent on the water, the air, the plants and the animals. Inseperable.

We are all soul mates. 

Not only does everything we do in this life affect the body of everything else, but our interactions with one another each and every day, regardless of how casual or intimate affect one another's souls.

As you take in the body of an animal, a carrot, a river, you are taking in the very incarnation of god. You are taking the one body of which you are a part into your own body. And in doing it, you are simultaneously destroying life and creating life all at the same time.  What could be more intimate and soul-mate-ish than that?

“Take and eat – this is my body, given for you.”

To comment, click on the header “We are all soul mates”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

Parables for a Pandemic - The Politician

the truth will make you free.

This parable is adapted from a facebook post by Shannon Thomas.

A Politican came to Jesus and asked him,  “Teacher, there are some who disrespect our flag and country by kneeling during the anthem.   Shouldn’t they show respect to the country? “

Jesus replied to the man and said, “I never told you to salute a flag or sing an anthem.  Never. There are many things I told you to do- like love your enemies, pray for them, and turn the other cheek, and repent and seek forgiveness too. But I never told you to salute a flag.”

The man replied, “Then teacher, how can we honor our country and promote patriotism?”

Jesus said, “ When did I tell you to honor your country and be patriotic? I told you to love the people, especially the poor. I didn’t instruct anyone to honor their country. I told you to love your neighbor.”

The man argued, “But our country is a beacon of freedom to the world!”

Jesus replied, “I told you the way to freedom is through truth. I said that if you continue in my word,  you will know the truth, and the truth will make you free.”

The man could not accept this teaching and asked, “What truth are you talking about?”

Jesus said, “ I desire mercy not sacrifice, go and learn what that means.”

The man became angry, “Mercy will get us nowhere. It takes sacrifice to bring freedom to the world.   What about our weapons and armories?  What about our brave soldiers who have sacrificed for freedom past and present?”

Jesus replied, “When did I tell you to build bombs and arm soldiers and wage war in order to be free? I never told you that. I said just the opposite. I told you to love your neighbor and your enemy and to pursue mercy not sacrifice...none of that included flags or armies and soldiers and killing. None of it.”

The man was incredulous, “None?”

Jesus said, “None of it.”

The man went away sad because this was a very impractical political policy. 

To comment, click on the header “Parables for a Pandemic - the Politician”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

The Anti-Christ Gospel - Anger

You aren’t answerable to anyone.

Anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”… Except on social media.  You can get as rude and abusive as you want there.  Name calling and put downs are totally fine.   It’s OK to say to your brother or sister, ‘Raca.’  You aren’t answerable to anyone.   And if you say, ‘You fool’ don’t worry about it. 

To comment, click on the header “The Anti-Christ Gospel - Anger”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

Happiness is a tyrant

Can’t we just be and feel whatever we feel without feeling as though we’ve failed at life, without feeling like someone else has failed us?

A friend and I were talking about marriage the other day. She’s been married a long time and I’ve been married twice, so we felt like between the two of us, we had some knowledge on the matter. We were talking the other day about the pressure that is put on newlyweds to be “happy” in their new marriages.

I mean of course! Why wouldn’t you be happy? Your marriage is new, it’s exciting, it’s romantic, you are young and haven’t settled down to child-raising yet. What could be better?   

But, let’s face it, the early years of marriage are tough.  It’s tough to live with another person.  Your habits are different, your wants and desires are different. 

No one tells us how hard it’s going to be to live with another person.  We grow up hearing fairy stories about happily ever after and we think being a newlywed is synonymous with happiness.

No matter how much we love the person we live with, we hate how they leave the peanut butter on the spoon in the sink, how they leave the ice cube tray empty, how they smell sometimes, or weird noises they make.  We keep score: I’m doing more housework than you, I’m making more money than you, I’m contributing more to this relationship than you. 

Newlyweds don’t want to admit to anyone and especially not to their new spouse that they might be unhappy.  But that very admission, might actually be the best possible thing. It doesn’t mean they’ve failed. It doesn’t mean I’ve failed. But it’s an important thing to admit.

None of us wants to admit if or when we are unhappy.  We think that if we are unhappy there is something terribly wrong with us or with our lives.   We are afraid of being unhappy. Afraid it might mean failure, afraid it might mean loss, afraid it might mean pain.

And certainly, there may be times when we decide that we are unhappy with something or someone and it’s time for a change. But the difference there is that the unhappiness is about an actual circumstance and not about who we ARE. It’s not about success or failure, it’s about whether or not this or that particular ongoing circumstance aligns with what I want out of life. And even then, let’s be clear, even when we get what we want out of life, we may not feel a feeling of happiness. Maybe we will feel a sense of satisfaction, or achievement, maybe we will have more peace and less stress. But happiness? It’s elusive.

We are constantly inundated with the message that we just should BE happy. Bookstores are full of books that tell us how to be happy. Social media feeds are full of quotes and quips about how to find happiness. Gurus are telling us how to manifest happiness.

And in the frantic pursuit of happiness…. Happiness becomes a tyrant.  

I don’t think that happiness should be the goal.

Why can’t it just be OK to be unhappy?  What would be wrong with that? 

Happiness comes and goes.  We are happy as we leave work and head home. Then, we are unhappy when we get home from work and do two hours of housework while our husbands and children sit and watch Netflix.  We are happy when we anticipate starting that new Netflix series we’ve been wanting to watch. We are unhappy if we come home from work and sit and watch Netflix with our husbands and children and wake up to a filthy house the next day.   We are happy when the people we live with offer to chip in and help out.  We are unhappy afterward because of the bad attitude they had throughout and the poor quality of help they contributed.

Happiness comes

Happiness goes.

Unhappiness is inevitable.

It seems to me that when we stop trying to BE happy, we are much happier.  I mean, really – who cares?  Do we HAVE To be happy?  It seems like a lot of pressure to me. 

Can’t we just be up sometimes and down sometimes without having to try to achieve happiness?

Why the constant wish to feel something else than what we actually feel?

Can’t we just be and feel whatever we feel without feeling as though we’ve failed at life, without feeling like someone else has failed us?

To comment, click on the Header “Happiness is a Tyrant”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

The Anti-Christ Gospel - Murder

I am very pro-life and anti-murder, except in situations where I’m not

 “You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ “

I tell you that this is true,  I am very pro-life and anti-murder, except in situations where I’m not – like just wars, capital punishment and all those times in the Bible where I instructed the Israelites to kill innocent children.  I’m also fine with the police killing people whether they have proven their innocence or not, that’s OK.   Oh, and the crucifixion of my son on your behalf.  I wasn’t pro-life there either.  

To comment, click on the header, “The Anti-Christ Gospel - Murder”

Blog - Chasing the Red Dot RSS

How is your soul?

“The soul is like a wild animal”

How is your soul?

Someone said recently that they had been asked this question and didn’t know how to answer it.  I mean, how would you answer it? What does it even mean?

It seems to me that when people ask this question they are trying to create a dualism. Either your soul is saved or unsaved, found or lost, whole or broken, good or bad. They are trying to create a problem to be solved.

The way I answer this question is to say that the soul is the part of us that holds all those things at once:  wholeness and brokenness, good and bad, finding and losing, knowing and unknowing.

The mind and the ego look at the soul and divide it up into good/bad categories but the soul knows no such divisions.

The soul just is.

The soul holds it all, infinitely, eternally and without judgement.

How is your soul?

It is everything.

“The soul is like a wild animal—tough, resilient, savvy, self-sufficient and yet exceedingly shy. If we want to see a wild animal, the last thing we should do is to go crashing through the woods, shouting for the creature to come out. But if we are willing to walk quietly into the woods and sit silently for an hour or two at the base of a tree, the creature we are waiting for may well emerge, and out of the corner of an eye we will catch a glimpse of the precious wildness we seek.” Parker Palmer

Parables for a Pandemic - the two sons

He was young and felt there was little danger to him.

Jesus said, “A certain man had two sons.  The younger son said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of your estate.’ So the father sold off assets and liquidated his estate so that he could divide the estate between his sons. Soon afterward, the younger son gathered everything together and took a trip to a land far away. In that land there was a pandemic.  The son was interested only in having a good time and couldn’t be bothered wearing a mask and sheltering in place, so he went out to the bars and hired prostitutes and partied with his friends.  He was young and felt there was little danger to him.  

“Some time passed, and the son he had used up his resources.  The pandemic had caused an economic crisis and he could not find a job.   Soon, the son began to be in need. He hired himself out to a meat packing plant, who sent him into the factory to process pork.  He longed to eat his fill from the scraps that fell on the assembly line, but no one gave him anything and his wages barely covered rent and a diet of beans and rice. When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s workers and servants have more than enough food, and I’m starving to death!  I will get up and go home where there is no pandemic.  I will say to my father, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you.   I no longer deserve to be called your son. Take me on as one of your employees.” ’  So he got up and went to his father.

“While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was moved with compassion. His father ran to him, hugged him, and kissed him. Then his son said, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I no longer deserve to be called your son.’  But the father said to his employees, ‘Quickly, clear out the corner office and get him set up in it.  Hire some caterers and a DJ, and we will throw a fantastic welcome home party!   This son of mine was dead and has come back to life! He was lost and is found!’ And they had a party. 

“Now his older son had been away on a business trip and when he returned the party was in progress.   He called the head of sales and asked him what was going on. He replied, ‘Your brother has arrived, and your father has given him an executive position and the corner office.  He hired caterers and a DJ to throw this party because your brother is safe and sound.’ About a week later, the son became sick and learned he had contracted COVID19 at the meat packing plant.  His father and many of the workers at the party became sick as well.  The older son was furious and said to his father, ‘Look, I’ve served you all these years, and I never disobeyed your instructions.  You never gave me the corner office, or a party. but when this son of yours returned, after gobbling up your estate on prostitutes and you gave him everything.  He knew the risks when he returned and took no precautions and now you and half your workforce are sick because of him.   Then his father said, ‘Son, you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But this brother of yours was dead and is alive. He was lost and is found.’”

The Anti-Christ Gospel - The Light of the World

Social media is the key to letting your light shine before others

 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden.  Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.”  So, be sure to be as obnoxious, outspoken and abrasive as possible, especially on social media.  Remember, “Outrage over Outreach!” Don’t waste your time with acts of love and service, no one will see those.  Social media is the key to letting your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven