An acquaintance of mine recently remarked on the fact that he was having difficulty approaching a conversation with some family members who were concerned about the direction his life was taking. They were “praying for him”. He was put off by their “Christianese” (as he called it). To him, it didn’t feel like a comforting or caring sentiment, but more like an accusation.
These family members may have intended their sentiment “I’ll be praying for you” to sound sweet and caring. But it felt like an affront. It felt condescending and exclusionary. I know nothing about their intent, maybe they truly loved and cared for him, maybe they felt superior and self-righteous. Who knows? They obviously felt he needed praying-for, which led him to feel judged, not loved. “I’ll be praying for you” did not express caring as they may have hoped, but rather it set up an “us” vs. “you” dynamic.
I think this was in part due to the “Christianese”.
The jargon.
Jargon very quickly and naturally becomes a part of the persona we develop without even thinking about it.
Jargon does two things:
It binds together. It identifies us as a group. We all speak this way/use this lingo, therefore we are all part of this group.
It separates. You do not speak this way, or understand this lingo, therefore you are NOT a part of this group.
And because it serves as a means of separating groups, it becomes its own type of violence in communication – regardless of intent.
And whether we admit it or not, that subtle act of violence makes us feel good. It contributes to a sense of belonging, special-ness, or superiority of some type. Perhaps it means we are more spiritual, more hip, more educated, tougher, younger.
It’s power.
We participate in our jargon to demonstrate we are part of the "in group". And we use it to identify who is part of our group and who we can exclude as the "out group"
It’s hard not to slip into your jargon. I kind of love it when one of my Canadian-isms slips out. I like my Canadian past and like being identified with it. It makes me feel unique. I also like to use terms like “PRN” and “QD” when I’m in doctor’s offices, so they will take me more seriously. I hate business jargon, probably because I don’t really identify with my job and don’t want to be identified as one of those “corporate types”. But I work with many who love the corporate jargon. They love to “drill down” and “take a deep dive”. Biologists love to drop an “aptosis” or an “eutrophication” out there. Bible scholars love their exegesis and hermeneutics and philosophers love to discuss epistemological and ontological matters.
Religious jargon
Teen jargon
Academic jargon
Medical jargon
Intellectual jargon
Political jargon
Liberal jargon
Conservative jargon
It builds walls.
If words exist:
to communicate,
to bring people together,
to build bridges…
Then the goal should be to make them as relate-able as possible.
Easily understood.
Inclusive.
Non-violent.
Words matter.
Not only is this true for "those Christians who use that Christianese" but also for intellectuals who use their big words, for adults when they speak to kids, for biologists when they speak to non-biologists, for persons from one country when they speak to persons from another, for doctors when they speak to patients...
Word. ;)
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