When i was going through my divorce, I saw someone wearing a T shirt with the Gary Paulsen quote, "I tried to contain myself but I escaped." That was the T shirt I needed.
I had tried for years to be the person my first husband wanted me to be, the woman my religion wanted me to be, the person God wanted me to be.
In the end, I just ended up being false. To myself and to others. And eventually I just couldn't keep it up. Turns out religion and my first husband couldn't contain me. And god sure didn't want to.
I escaped.
We can try to apply our judgments and dualisms to people, however they will refuse to be contained.
They will continually defy our categorizations.
The “bad” person will do good and surprise us.
The “good” person will do evil and surprise us.
We will find ourselves trying to control others so as not to be surprised, disappointed, hurt, abandoned or deceived.
Or, we will exit relationships, one after another so as to avoid that type of uncertainty.
Grace that says that a human being can’t really be dealt with in this way. Can’t be boxed or caged.
A human is as infinite and unknowable as God himself -- made in the image of God in this way and others.
Grace means a person is free to evolve in any direction and into endless possibilities and outcomes.
A human being is unpredictable, unknowable. If it were not so, we would become bored and lonely with human beings. They would be no different than objects and possessions. Our very control of them would render them uninteresting.
How can we possibly have relationships with such unpredictable beings? It's just too risky.
Grace.
(To comment, click on header)